Another Love Story

Inquire   He was just a guyinthestreet, this is our story.

Day 70

He gives me a name on his tumblr. 

It starts depicting some of our adventures together as best friends instead of his one night stands and escapades with women around new york city. 

It’s sweet, I think. 

I wonder if he is really changing.

— 4 days ago
#tumblr  #P+C  #love  #bestfriends 
Day 20

I go to a birthday party for our friends, he’s supposed to be there. 

He’s not. “Dinner plans” He says.

Ugh. Ignored. all night. 

In the morning I text him.

"Get your shit together."

"What, what do you mean?!?!" 

"Seriously, standing up your friends for a girl, what the fuck. Stop with the nonsense"

Silence for a night.

Texts me later: “You’re the first person that’s ever called me out for my bullshit. Want to hang out tomorrow?

— 4 days ago
#texts  #friends  #love 
Day 1

We meet on a football team that I signed up for with my roommate, to try and get over my ex-boyfriend of 10 years. “I’ve got to get out of this apartment, let’s do something crazy.” 

We’d done cursory facebook research of everyone on our team. Nothing to report, but we’ll see.

We get there, I’m wearing a hanson concert t-shirt because it’s the only red shirt I have in my closet, I’m slightly hungover. I’m also terrible at football. It’s about 100 degrees outside. Sweaty. Gross.

We got to a bar, happy hour. He has hat on, like my brothers, I think. We chat with everyone. There’s something about him, he’s so charismatic. His eyes are kind.

"What did you think about C?" I asked later whenever I’m with my roommates. 

I see a text. It’s from him. 

He invites us all to watch a movie. We do, he barely speaks to me but we share a couch. He’s texting someone else the whole time. Weird, I think.

We get in a cab and I immediately have a text from him. We talk until 3:00am with plans to hang out the next day. 

I haven’t wanted to talk to someone like that in…. well, ever.

— 4 days ago
#football  #love 

He might have just been a guyinthestreet, but it was different to me.

— 4 days ago
#love  #guyinthestreet 
Day 60

The first time we do it I wasn’t expecting it so I didn’t have the chance to be nervous. 

As a little bit too skinny blogger on a budget for infrequent soul cycles I would normally be self conscious.. I don’t even think to make sure I have matching underwear on.

He’s clearly used to black lace but it doesn’t matter. At all. 

Chemistry, a real thing.

— 4 days ago
#love  #sex  #relationships 
Day 7

We go out to The Wren for a couple of drinks. 

I was really nervous, it was my first date since splitting with my boyfriend of 10 years, which makes it my first date since I was 15. I buy a new shirt from Zara, spend $200 at Sephora for god knows what, paint my nails, get roommate outfit approval. When we are there I have no clue why I would be nervous, he is so easy to talk to, so charming. The time flies by, and looking back those hours at the Wren were the first time I remember not thinking about L and what I had lost, just being happy. 

It’s time to go home and he invites me over to watch a movie. I had no clue what watch a movie means besides eat popcorn and get on netflix but it’s clear he has other things in mind.

We go up to his bedroom and I marvel at how clearly guy it is- one pillow, video games, simple, clean, a huge tv and clearly a bachelor pad. He starts kissing me all over and I crack up- wait, is this watching a movie? I kiss back and when his hands move down a little I freak out. Wait, we aren’t watching a movie. 

"Whats the matter?" 

"Um it’s just that, well you see I think I’m freaking out a little because we only just met and yeah like, I just (shut up I’m thinking to myself) really need to go home because yeah I want to be friends and this is really fast and confusing and yeah I don’t know what to do so yeah um I think I’m going to catch a cab now but I’ll see you tomorrow and okay bye."  Walks quickly to the door. 

"Okay? Well let me know when you get home." 

— 4 days ago
#awkward  #embarrassing  #life  #love 
Day 599

We are every couple in every movie imaginable, it was a secret joke of ours, but really pretty true.

He was the Joe Fox to my Kathleen Kelly. Me the innocent, slightly naive, caught up in fairy tale, can’t really make anyone upset, him the business man constantly pushing me to stand up and fight but with a secret soft spot. Our back and forth texts all day… “we’re just friends.” But, in a world where Kathleen Kelly is still a little bit stuck on what happened with her and Frank Navasky. And she still secretly wonders how Frank is doing at night despite the fact that she never really loved him that much. Loved him, but not really all that much. Still, he was comforting, and predictable. Reliable. The guilt of how much Kathleen loves Joe compared to how little she loved Frank keeps her up at night. What happens after Harry Nillson’s Somewhere Over the Rainbow Riverside Park meet up? Do they survive, do two people so totally opposite make it work? 

He was also the Ryan Gosling in Crazy Stupid Love and I’m Emma Stone- the game changer to his former playerness, the spending late night studying instead of partying, the laughing at his clearly carefully crafted persona. They spend the first night cracking each other up and talking.. But where does that movie end? Is she really a game-changer? What if Ryan suddenly gets scared of commitment and decides the trips to west elm and pottery barn to decorate the apartment you share together and you sleeping in flannel pajamas cause you get cold at night aren’t as fun as the one night stands and the one pillow bed and constant rotation? What about when things get hard? What about when his issues with his parents come up to haunt you and your health gets bad and jobs are stressful and money is tight. Does Ryan stay? Does he bail because it’s easier? 

And most of all, we’re Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf, how hilariously and awfully juvenile but it’s the story that most closely resembles ours. My secret guilty pleasure- the show.. and him, dark, brooding, troubled and jaded, but with a kind heart and deep love. Me: confused, back and forth, up and down. 

He said to me once “those stories have endings written that way, you can’t write the ending to this.” Dear you, this is me writing the ending.

To quote another movie though, this is not a love story, it’s a story about love. 

— 4 days ago
#love  #love story  #movie  #gossip girl  #ryangosling  #crazystupidlove  #emma stone 
Day 600

As I sit here and eat my sandwich from the bodega across the street, I think about the day we moved in. The nervous excitement, the energy, how it was another 100 degree day in August. We were so excited about bodgea— it was an Italian market with what I deemed “my very favorite sandwich ever” (brie, gouda, pesto and sprouts on tomato foccacia, like it matters). “We’ll get food here one night a week, it will be our thing”  we promised each other. 

We ate there on move in day and it never happened. This is the first time I’ve had that sandwich since move in day, and there’s no one here sharing it with me.

— 4 days ago
#love  #love story  #anotherlovestory  #day 600